Ah, the 'Eureka' moment of my first orgasm. It felt like stumbling upon the best biryani recipe. You know, like when scientists finally nailed down the mind-bending theory of relativity or when someone ingeniously realized that a well-placed smack on the TV fixed the wonky signal. I think my heart raced faster than a caffeinated squirrel.
So many women I know have such incredible, wonderful and wildly different first orgasm stories. Let’s get in for a whole lot of ‘aha!’
#1: S, 26, Delhi, Client Service Provider
Ah, my first orgasm? Utterly happenstance. My jet spray was in action, and the water was rushing out. Then, by a wild accident - the water's force danced upon my, well, little buddy down there (didn't know that it was called the clit yet). It felt so good, I kept going. And voila, there came my big O. As I grew up, I upgraded to vibrators, but a good spray still brings a nostalgic smile. And sometimes, I go that way.
Looking back, I can't help but appreciate fate. Considering my upbringing, diving headfirst into the world of sex toys or even a bit of finger fun might have made me feel ashamed or guilty. But my accidental rendezvous with the jet spray? Somehow, it feels like a very innocent thing to do.”
#2: J, 30, Patna, CA
I’ve been with multiple partners - but have never reached the great grand finale.
I started believing that maybe I’m rigid, and that it’s not meant to happen for me. I moved towards having sex for the pleasure it brings, and not the end goal. Then, out of the blue, a partner's hands began to move a certain way, and I knew something was happening to me. Something that hasn’t happened before.
And then, they stopped. I begged them to go on, but only in my head. My shyness kept me in check, and I couldn’t ask for what I wanted.
So I went home, and tried repeating exactly what they were doing. And oh boy, what followed was a couple of orgasms, and the best sleep ever.
Back then, I hoped for my partner’s fingers to continue. But truth be told, doing it myself was one of the first steps I took towards unlocking my own body atlas. Who knew a hands-on (hehe) experience could be this illuminating?
#3: P, 29, Mumbai, Student
I come from a teeny-tiny town - where even friendships with another gender is hush hush, and easily becomes the talk of the town. When I moved to Bombay, most of what I did was an act of defiance, an attempt to live unapologetically. I climaxed the first time my partner went down on me. Infact, I came as my partner’s tongue rolled around me, even before any penetration.
My first orgasm felt like rebellion and liberation at the same time.
#4: K, 24, Rourkela, Social Media Manager
For the longest time, I thought that masturbation was this hymen-breaking act. It would toss me out of the 'virgin' club. Thanks to the epic lack of sex ed in small towns, paired with ‘what a crown virginity is’. Then, cue the blockbuster girlfriend chat session.
It started with one of our friend’s first orgasm with her partner and I slipped in my fear. The result? Grins, barely-there chuckles and a whole lot of their internet-acquired wisdom.
I masturbated for the first time that very night, I’d already waited long enough!
We're in dire need of some truth-telling when it comes to the birds, bees, and everything in between. I really hope that no other young girl goes down the rabbit hole I did.
#5: M, 21, Mumbai, Student
Before we get into this story, here’s some context: whenever a guy goes down there, my bladder suddenly starts singing a pee anthem.
He was like the god (read : devil) in bed. We were in the middle of sweaty action, and then, like always, I felt the sudden urge to pee. But this time, it was a lot more urgent. I had to run. I pushed him away and ran to the washroom. But, no pee. Nada. Nothing.
Now, this was a guy I liked, not another hookup. I spoke to him about what happened. He laughed! Not a polite chuckle, mind you. He's having a full-on belly laugh moment. He then explained how it might have been the onset of an orgasm, and that I didn’t actually have to pee. How was I supposed to know this! So, we gave it another shot. I didn’t run this time, even though I felt like I could pull off a pee Olympics any second. Lucky for me, he was right.
I call this story ‘my pee or not to pee’ dilemma.
#6: U, 36, Calcutta, Homemaker
I dropped a truth bomb on my husband, the fact that I’ve never had an orgasm before. “Never?,” he asked, eyes wide enough to catch flies. He was confident that he’d be able to make me cum. He tried and failed. Tried and failed a couple of times more. I expected him to accept defeat.
But oh no, he pulled a 180-degree surprise, something that even I hadn’t done yet. He started reading up about female anatomy, orgasms and everything he could get his hands on. He learnt that it takes a lot more than just penetrative sex for most women to climax. He also got a vibrator! Then, one night, with glasses of wine and a blend of oral sex and vibrator - we were both on cloud 9.
It’s slightly embarrassing that I never took the agency myself earlier - but, I focus on the positive side : my orgasm count? Through the roof!
#7: N, 37, Coimbatore, Strategy Director
I’d already kissed some wonderful girls. One trouble though, I was confused about sex when it came to lesbians. Credits to our schools that side-step the LGBTQIA+ in the already almost negligible conversation about sex.The first girl I made out with, was thankfully, experienced. She knew what to do, and exactly how to do it. It was during dry humping with her that I had my first orgasm.
It was a feeling of immediate post nut clarity - this is what I want for the rest of my life.
Also Read: 7 People Share Their Idea of Foreplay
#8: H, 23, Chennai, Aspiring Photographer
A hazy memory, but oh, I remember the aftermath like it was just an hour ago. ‘I want a lot of these tiny explosions.’ My first one was in the afternoon, and I remember my evening thoughts - fireworks, earth-shattering, the most exciting thing I’ve ever experienced. And then, I got to it again, the same night, and came at least four more times the same day.
What did these stories make you feel? Is your story a little similar to any of the wonderful women I spoke to? What’s your first orgasm story? Or second? Or third? Write to Aunt sassy about it, these are the kind of conversations she’s living for!
About the Author
Hemali (she/her) is an explorer of the realms of sexuality, intimacy, and dating. She talks endlessly about the evolving landscape of feminist narratives on the big screen and makes you reanalyze the portrayal of women in mainstream culture. If you're looking for alternative conversation starters, take your pick from: Biryani, Art Fairs, or Spoken Word Poetry.