I had this epic brunch date all planned with one of my best girls - bottomless mimosas, spaghetti pasta goals, and all the gossip. But then, plot twist: work swoops in and snatches her away!

Now, here’s the scoop: she recently got ghosted by a guy she thought was the one. And so, for the brunch, I had all these amazeballs things to do now list for her in my head. Now that she’s canceled - I need to do something with all my solid recommendations. So think of this ‘how to deal with rejections and heartbreaks and ghosting listicle; as a virtual brunch with yours truly. 

1. Become a Bhoot-Buster:

It’s time to ghost the ghosts, baby!
Step a: DELETE. THAT. CONTACT. Like how you deleted those skinny jeans from your life in 2024. So outdated.
Step b: Hit that unfollow button. If you can’t, have your bestie do it. Trust us, once outta sight, soon outta mind.
Step c: Block & Mute. This new gen z passive aggressive lurking around their stories - uh huh not cool! Privacy is the new glow-up darling.
Step d: You might see a giant hole in your life which could probably be filled in by a new crush - maybe a fictional character (bonus points if it’s one of the Salvatore brothers!)

2. EX-cess Cleanse:

Let’s be real: those mementos just trigger tears. It’s time for a glow-up, full up discard and detox style. Make an ASMR viral reel - cleanse your apartment, say tata bye bye to their hoodies and the random receipt from your first date. (If this reel looks more like the time when Phoebe, Rachel and Monica got together for that Ex-boyfriend Bonfire, I fully support that too.)

Pro tip: Add in some win, blast my breakup anthem - New Rules by Dua Lipa and get a whole big ass new dustbin! Reclaim your space, my love.

You can go one step further and go a digi-detox. Delete those selfies, vlogs and saved snapchats. Your phone is always popping with the ‘Your storage is full’ notification - it’s finally time to listen!

3. Take a grief trip:

Grief is a complex, messy and unexpected journey. Sometimes, you need to feel it all. When those emotions do come crashing in, let it out. Want to cry? Yes please! Cry even louder. Want to nap? Be a professional napper - or a yapper. Please remember, it’s okay to not be okay. No one said you need to have your act together 24/7, okay?

Pro tip pt. 2: Keep a journal where you could keep writing those emotions down. Fill pages and pages and pages . Who knows someday you might be the one writing this article!

4. Hashtag Behencode:

When you are going through this, know that you are not alone. Always trust your girls. They are the ones who truly get it - they have screenshots & everything! Do grocery runs, mani-pedis, go to the movies or just binge watch Netflix with popcorn - all’s good as long as it’s with your most favorite gals. Who knew healing could come with a side of popcorn and drama?

5. BRB:

You need to keep your BRB mode on! If he calls you, just say BRB, gotta go.Keeping yourself busy = less time to obsess over them. It’s simple girl math.

Plus you can channel your energy into something that’s actually productive. Pick up that side hustle, take that extra shift up, pick the book you’ve always wanted to read, and best of all - self care. Just keep yourself in constant motion. Only you mum knows how tough it is to get you to that swim class - sign up, sign up now!

6. The Red Lip Revolution:

One thing you can never go wrong with is a red lip! Swipe on the brightest red lipstick you own, one that could blind someone if they looked too closely. Go out. Dance, laugh too loudly, and let everyone know that a breakup won’t break you. Red lips, confidence, and a dance floor - that’s the trifecta, babe.

7. Flirt like it’s your job:

If you’ve been in a long term relationship, one thing you would’ve forgotten is how fun it is to flirt with complete strangers. Start slow - smile at a stranger, strike up a fun convo at the coffee shop, and just soak up the attention. No strings attached, no pressure. Just enjoy the thrill of flirtatious banter. Getting a few compliments will remind you how much of a catch you really are.

8. Put the 'Fun' in Dysfunctional :

Download the hottest dating app and swipe right on the most outrageous profiles just for giggles. Dive into hilariously awkward conversations - think of Joey dating that actress who thought he was Dr. Drake Ramoray. This isn’t about finding true love; it’s all about collecting funny stories and enjoying the wild ride.

9. Your clit needs a new bestie :

I get it, you miss the tongue down there. But don’t worry - LIT suction Massager is here for you. All you’ve to do is play some audio erotica, light up those scented candles, and get going. I really strongly recommend this because babygirl, all our lovely frns will never ghost, never reject and be ready whenever you are.

And for the 10th, last and final tip : do whatever the hell you want. Aunt Sassy is cheering for you in a bikini and a red lip ;)

Before we wrap up this breakup boot camp, let’s not forget the true MVPs in the self-care department: vibrators, water based lubes, and all things that bring you pure bliss. Whether you're indulging in a night of “me-time” or spicing things up with a partner later down the line, these sex toys never ghost, never disappoint, and are always ready for action. Trust me, babe, investing in the right toy and the silkiest lube is the ultimate glow-up for both your body and your vibe.

Also, check out our blogs on Understanding slow sex and beginners guide to pegging to improve your knowledge of sexual health.

About the Author:

Hemali (she/her) is an explorer of the realms of sexuality, intimacy, and dating. She talks endlessly about the evolving landscape of feminist narratives on the big screen and makes you reanalyze the portrayal of women in mainstream culture. If you're looking for alternative conversation starters, take your pick from: Biryani, Art Fairs, or Spoken Word Poetry.