Think about the last time you were waiting for your favorite food delivery to arrive. You’re tracking your order, it’s going to reach you in about 27 minutes. Do you remember the excitement leading up to the doorbell ring? Well, what if I told you that scheduling sex can give you the same adrenaline rush?
Let's face it : Most mainstream romcoms and TV shows have taught us that all good relationships are filled with fiery, spicy, spontaneous sex. They have programmed us to believe that a great sex life involves - ‘ I want to take you right here, right now!’
However, Aunt Sassy wonders if that is really the case. She went on a wild goose chase of articles, videos, and interviews - and the results were eye-opening, to say the least! Turns out, scheduling some sexy time can do wonders for your bedroom dynamics with a partner! So, let's plunge into the whys and hows of scheduling sex, and hear what some enthusiastic proponents have to say about it!
1. Scheduling sex allows more experimentation
Think of scheduling sex as an invitation to an all-out sexperimentation party. By pre-locking the time for physical intimacy, you allow yourself and your partner to plan and prepare for it.
You could use this time to get your hands on some tantalizing sex toys or personal massagers, fantasize about new scenarios or even set the mood with a sexy cosplay.
“I knew that I was going to have sex that night, so I put on sexy lingerie, perfume, and also kept my favorite erotica videos handy. My partner was so turned on, even before he actually touched me, ” said Kavya, a 29 year old poet from Delhi.
Needless to say, this will be a major upgrade to your experience!
2. It improves the emotional connect in a relationship
While scheduling sex might sound unromantic at first, it is one of the most romantic ways to feel closer to your partner. By specifically carving out time, you’re sending a clear message that your partner is a priority. This builds a sense of trust and emotional intimacy in a relationship.
“Before we get into the covers, we get into the right mindset,” says Roshan, a 27 year old data analyst residing in Bombay. “We tick off all to-dos and switch off the email notifications, thus ensuring that we’re fully present with each other. This has made me feel connected to her like never before.”
3. It's the appetizer for your mind before the main course
You know those days where everything goes wrong and you just really want to crawl into your bed? But, what if you had something to look forward to? That's where scheduling sex comes in. By anticipating intimate moments, you can inject a much-needed dose of excitement and anticipation into your day.
Regardless of what happens at work, you know you’re going to get hot and heavy in a few more hours! The thought of it alone can put a spring in your step and make the worst day feel bearable.
“It’s like knowing that a slice of cake awaits you at home after you’ve been starving the whole day,” Krina, a 29 year old strategy manager from Delhi shared how she views scheduling intimacy.
4. It’s the cure for erotic anxiety
Do you want to initiate sex, but aren’t sure if your partner is in the mood? Or, maybe you're worried about not feeling prepared? This is what we call erotic anxiety, and honestly, it's more common than you might think. Scheduling sex can be a powerful tool for overcoming these concerns.
“Me and my partner often find ourselves better prepared, both mentally and physically,” says Pranti, 32, an HR from Bengaluru.
5. It helps you take more control of your sex life
Scheduling sex can be a game-changer for women who feel pressured to always be sexually available. By taking charge of their own sexual experiences, women can feel more confident and empowered in the bedroom.
Additionally, when it comes to couples with mismatched libidos, scheduling sex can help ensure that both partners are on the same page. This ensures no more awkward conversations!
Also Read: 4 Must-Try Solo Sex Positions for Self-Pleasure and Love
Now that you’re aware of the power of scheduling intimate time, whip out that planner and start calendar-ing steamy nights. Your brain, body, and relationship will thank you for it. Who knew being organized could be so sexy?
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About the Author
Hemali (she/her) is an explorer of the realms of sexuality, intimacy, and dating. She talks endlessly about the evolving landscape of feminist narratives on the big screen and makes you reanalyze the portrayal of women in mainstream culture. If you're looking for alternative conversation starters, take your pick from: Biryani, Art Fairs, or Spoken Word Poetry.
