Ever played a video game and intentionally delayed completing a quest just to savour the anticipation of the final boss battle? Or maybe you're the type who watches a gripping series, but deliberately pauses just before the season finale to let the suspense linger a little longer. Well, my friends, that's the essence of edging—except instead of battling dragons or solving mysteries, you're exploring the thrilling peaks of pleasure with yourself or your partner. Intrigued? Let's unlock the secrets to mastering edging, because sometimes, the journey truly is the most exhilarating part.
First things first - let us understand what edging really means. It is simply the act of avoiding orgasm while masturbating by slowing or stopping when you get close. This way, you stay at the ‘edge’ of cumming.
Imagine you're at a wild party. You're grooving to a sick beat when suddenly, the DJ drops a sneak peek of the next banger. The crowd goes wild, everyone hyped up for what's next. With a mischievous grin, the DJ holds back just a bit longer, letting the tension build. The energy in the room reaches a fever pitch, and just when you think you can't take it anymore, BAM! The bass drops, and the whole place explodes with cheers and crazy dance moves. This is how edging can feel like.
Why edge?
Why do it? Well, because while masturbation feels amazing, the feeling does not last long. Edging just extends the duration of that feeling. You can enjoy yourself a little longer, and eventually, have a stronger, long-lasting orgasm that feels much more satisfying.
When we're having some sexy times, our brains light up like a fireworks show. It's all thanks to our nervous systems teaming up—the parasympathetic and sympathetic ones—to set off pleasure alarms in our heads. It's like hitting all those sweet spots that make you feel like you're in a high or having some wild out-of-body adventure. Why do people enjoy physical activities or sports? It's that high you get from pushing your body hard. Now add in some spicy thoughts and sexy scenes, cozy vibes, maybe even with a partner—it's a recipe for a seriously good time.
It is also said to help with premature ejaculation and increasing libido in men. Men’s sexual health expert Laura Purdy says in this article -
“Sometimes there can be psychological components as well as physiological components to premature ejaculation. Edging can help with premature ejaculation because it can train the person to hold off on their orgasm until more time has passed.”
There are a whole lot of other benefits of edging - apart from increasing the intensity and duration of the orgasm, it makes you more aware about your body, pleasure points and sexual triggers. If you do it with a partner, it can help you both find new ways of enhancing sex and build greater confidence and intimacy between the two (or three) of you.
So how do you do it?
Coming back to the right question - how do you edge? What are the best tricks and tips? There is no one such trick, and honestly, you make your own rules. However, the ‘start and stop’ and ‘riding the edge’ are two basic techniques that can help you master the art of edging if you are a beginner. Start and stop is where you should begin; start by masturbating very slowly and gradually increase to a medium pace. It’s important you don’t go too fast or too hard, you want the pleasure to build gradually. Then when you feel even the first twinge of an orgasm approaching, stop. Take some deep breaths, let yourself come down, and repeat, going from slow, to medium, to stopping
Think of the urge to orgasm on a scale from 1 to 10, where 1 is when you’re not hard or wet at all, and 10 is cumming. Now 9 is the point of no-return, when you simply cannot help yourself from cumming. The aim should be to slowly build until 8, and then come back to a 5. It is not as mathematical or technical as it sounds, but with practice you know your triggers and when you need to slow down.
Beginners may edge 4-5 times before reaching orgasm. This may increase as you become more aware of your body and learn to recognise the signs of orgasm. While you can edge as many times as you like, but avoid doing it to the point where the act becomes uncomfortable or frustrating for you or your partner.
Edging during solo play
First things first, find your chill zone. Pick a comfy spot where you can relax and get cozy for some solo fun. Edging is all about stretching out the good times, so skip standing up. Try your bed or a reclining chair instead. Set the mood with some favourite tunes, light some scented candles, switch some mood lighting on and get the vibe just right.
Don't dive straight for the main event. Instead, explore other pleasure points like your shoulders, nipples, and inner thighs. Gently rub these spots—they can feel amazing and kickstart the whole experience. As you move to other areas, take deep breaths to slow down your nervous system and really get into the mood. When you're ready, head towards the genital area, but take your time. Rub your inner thighs and the surrounding area, but hold off on the main attraction.
If you're not feeling the heat yet, don't worry. Edging is all about patience and knowing when to pause, so take it slow. If you're not hard or wet yet, go back and repeat the earlier steps. Gently apply lube to your penis or vagina and rub slowly. I repeat, SLOWLY. When you feel an orgasm building, stop touching yourself.
Take deep breaths and relax. The goal is to return to a semi-aroused state. You'll be repeating this step, so pay attention. Once the intense pleasure fades a bit, start touching yourself again, building up slowly. Enjoy the journey because that's what edging is all about. When you get close to orgasm, stop again. Take deep breaths and wait a few minutes. You can gently massage around the area without pushing yourself over the edge. Once you're ready, start again, slowly increasing the pace.
If you accidentally go over the edge, don't hold back. Just enjoy the orgasm. After edging for a while, the final release should be even stronger than usual.
How to Edge with a Partner
The basics are the same, but with a partner, it gets even more fun. Since you can't always tell when to stop, it adds an exciting layer. Sometimes, your partner might beg to cum, and wow, that's hot. Being in control of their pleasure and seeing them enjoy it because of you is pretty special.
To make edging more enjoyable, talk it over with your partner before you start. This way, you'll both know what to expect and understand each other's preferences. It's all about communication and mutual pleasure!
Using toys to add extra fun
Edging with a partner can be a thrilling experience, especially when you bring sex toys into the mix. Start by discussing your boundaries and preferences with your partner to ensure you're both on the same page. Use a vibrator on sensitive areas like the nipples, inner thighs, or the base of the penis to build up pleasure without reaching the climax too quickly. For this, you can use any of our vibrators with different sensation levels- the LIT suction massager, Salty, Candy or Flex. The Taco male stroker massager can be perfect for edging—use it slowly on the penis, pausing just before the peak to heighten anticipation. For those with a vagina, an insertion toy like Candy can be a game-changer. Slowly insert and withdraw the massager, keeping the movements gentle and deliberate. The key is to communicate and take turns using these toys to bring each other to the brink of orgasm, then stop, take deep breaths, and enjoy the delicious buildup all over again. This mutual control and the variety of sensations from the toys make the experience even more intense and pleasurable!
When it comes to solo fun, you have even more control since you know exactly when to stop. Use the same steps with your favourite toys—a vibrator, a stroker, or an insertion toy. Slowly build up the pleasure by exploring different sensitive areas and then pausing just before you reach the peak. Take deep breaths and enjoy the anticipation before starting again. The added control in solo play allows you to perfectly time your stops and starts, making the final orgasm incredibly powerful!
Edging is a game-changer in the world of pleasure, and it’s easy to see why it’s so popular. This technique isn’t just about prolonging pleasure – it’s about making the final release intensely satisfying. Knowing the right technique involves a mix of patience, self-control, and a bit of adventurous spirit. Whether you’re using your hands or incorporating fun toys, the key is to go slow and enjoy every sensation. You’ll feel like you’re riding a roller coaster of pleasure, and you’re the one controlling the ride. So, next time you’re in the mood, try edging and discover why it’s a favourite for taking orgasms to the next level!
Also check out our blogs on - sex drive and different sex positions
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About the Author
Disha (she/her) believes she's half therapist because people spill their guts to her with ease. But for now, she's writing sassy pieces on the internet about all things fun and pop culture. With a flair for wit and a curious spirit, she is all about digging into the saucy details of human intimacy.
