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Why Do People Still Say No to Condoms
Why Do People Still Say No to Condoms

Let’s talk pleasure myths, red flags, and the “pull-out” delusion.
You’re mid-makeout. Things are heating up. Clothes are on the floor. Hands and mouths are busy. And then—boom. That all-too-familiar pause:
“Do we really need a condom?”
Sigh.
Despite being one of the easiest ways to protect yourself from STIs and unplanned pregnancies, condoms are still treated like mood-killers. But where does this resistance actually come from? Is it really about “pleasure”? Or is there something deeper (and sneakier) at play?
The Great “It Feels Better” Excuse
Let’s get this out of the way: yes, sex can feel different with a condom. But the idea that it's instantly worse or ruined? That’s a myth wrapped in ego.
For some folks, condoms symbolize a lack of trust. Others use the “I can’t feel anything” line like it’s a golden ticket to bareback town. But here’s the tea: if your idea of intimacy relies on removing a 0.04mm latex barrier and ignoring your partner’s comfort and safety—you’re not giving main character energy. You’re giving red flag.
The Internet Has Thoughts—And They're Spicy
Reddit is basically a confessional booth for the modern age. Women on r/TwoXChromosomes and r/sex have been very candid about their experiences with men who resist condoms, and the responses range from hilarious to horrifying.
Here are a few gems:
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u/gbAE2010 said:
My baby sister was dating a very sketchy guy up until a few days ago. This guy was trying to get her pregnant on purpose so that he could have a child with her. He claimed that condoms "hurt his dick" and that if he pulled out, she wouldn't get pregnant. She believed him and they had unprotected sex. Within two months of dating, she became pregnant, and since us being from a crazy religious family, she freaked out and got an abortion without telling anyone.
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u/Funny_Employer_3974 said:
One night, we were fooling around in bed. I told him to wear a condom, he agreed and proceeded. I looked and there was NO CONDOM. He stealthed me.
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u/revolution_starter said:
He pulled the usual "I can't wear condoms/I can't feel anything/blah blah."
So I just casually tell him, "You better be rich. Because if I get pregnant, I'm definitely keeping the kid."
He freaked out and put on his pants.
Wait—Back to That Stealthing Thing
Yup, it has a name: stealthing is when someone secretly removes the condom during sex without your consent. And it’s not just messed up—it’s legally recognized as sexual assault and rape in multiple countries.
Stealthing is all about power. Think about it: it strips you of your ability to make an informed choice about your own body. So if you’ve experienced it, know this: your anger, confusion, and hurt are 100% valid. And if you’re navigating the aftermath, support and resources do exist.
The Pull-Out Method: AKA, Playing Sexual Russian Roulette
Let’s not pretend the pull-out method is some cute, carefree alternative. Even when done “perfectly,” it still comes with a side of sperm. And spoiler alert: people are not perfect. Pre-cum can contain sperm. And none of this does anything to prevent STIs.
So, unless your birth plan is “roll the dice and see what happens,” maybe don’t put your faith in someone’s vague sense of timing and misguided attempts at placating.
The Post-Sex Spiral: Unprotected Edition
Let’s talk about the morning after. Not the cute, cuddly one with coffee and cuddles—the oh no one:
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That “Wait… was that a risk?” inner monologue.
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A mad dash to find emergency contraception.
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Googling “early signs of chlamydia” at 2AM.
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Wondering if you should get tested again.
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Kicking yourself for not insisting harder.
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Looking up the cost of raising a child.
We’ve all been there—or known someone who has. And it’s not a vibe.
If someone’s go-to move is “no condom, no problem,” it’s worth asking: Are they prioritizing your pleasure? Your safety? Your peace of mind?
Condoms aren’t the enemy of intimacy—they’re the bare minimum. Protecting yourself is sexy. Clear communication is hot. And knowing your worth? That’s the biggest turn-on of all.
So next time someone says, “Do we really need a condom?”
Just say: “Yeah. We really do.”
And if they still complain?
Goodbye, and good luck.
About the Author:
Madhu (she/her) has been an avid reader of all things spicy since her childhood. She writes sassy blog posts and listicles now so that others may benefit from her wholly inappropriate, wholly informative tastes, too.
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