Picture this – you've been eagerly anticipating this night for what feels like forever. You've put on your best lingerie, spritzed your favourite perfume, and the excitement in the air is palpable. Finally, you and your partner are together, unable to keep your hands off each other. After some steamy foreplay, the main event begins…and it’s good, but not quite the marathon you had envisioned. Reality didn't quite match up to the fantasy sold by porn. You both try to brush it off, but later, you find yourselves texting your friends, “How long is sex supposed to last, anyway?”
This scenario is all too common. But fear not, because there are effective ways to enhance your playtime and make those intimate moments last longer. Whether you’re looking to level up your quality time or just curious about how to make the magic happen a bit more smoothly, you’re in the right place. Let’s dive into the juicy details on how to boost sex time.
Understanding how long sex takes
First things first, let’s talk about what “sex time” actually means. Spoiler alert: there’s no universal rule! Some people are all about that quick, passionate rendezvous, while others enjoy a longer, more drawn-out session. The average time for intercourse varies, but studies show it’s typically between 5 to 7 minutes.
Scientifically speaking, one of the most interesting studies we have on the average time to ejaculation involved 500 couples from around the globe, who timed their sexual encounters over a four-week period using a stopwatch. As cumbersome as it sounds, participants would press "start" at the moment of penile penetration and "stop" at ejaculation. While this method may seem a bit awkward and potentially disruptive to the mood, it provided some data to rely on.
The findings revealed a significant amount of variation in duration. The average time each couple spent on intercourse ranged from as brief as 33 seconds to as long as 44 minutes—an astonishing 80-times difference. This wide range clearly shows that there isn't a single "normal" duration for sex. However, when looking at the median across all couples, the average time was found to be 5.4 minutes.
But who says we can’t defy the average and go for gold, right?
How to increase the time of intercourse
So, how do you turn those few minutes into something more memorable and improve sex time? Here are some game-changing methods:
Foreplay, Foreplay, Foreplay
Don't skip the appetisers! Foreplay is not just a warm-up, but an essential part of the main course. Explore each other’s bodies, kiss, touch, and tease. The more time you spend here, the better, and more are the chances for you to increase the time of intercourse. This not only builds anticipation but also helps to slow things down, allowing you to enjoy the moment without rushing. Foreplay can set the stage for a more connected and pleasurable experience, making the final act not just longer, but also more fulfilling.
Remember, it’s not a race! Slow things down, savour every moment, and enjoy the journey. Alternate between fast and slow movements to keep things exciting and extend the experience.
Exercises
Ever been in a scenario where your partner wants to go for longer, but the position they’re into is literally exhausting? I remember my first time, feeling sorry for the poor guy. Seriously, can you imagine trying to keep thrusting in a half-plank position? This is where exercise comes in to boost your stamina and sex time. You know those gym reels that say, “Do this so you can later do that”? Well, they totally apply here too. Getting fit can make all the difference when it comes to lasting longer and enjoying every moment.
Even the Pelvic floor exercises, or Kegels, aren't just for postpartum recovery—they're a game-changer for your sex life. Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles can significantly improve your control and endurance during sex and further improve sex time. For penis owners, this can mean better control over ejaculation, and for vulva owners, it can enhance muscle tone for more intense orgasms. The best part? You can do these exercises anywhere, anytime—no equipment needed. Just contract and relax the muscles you'd use to stop the flow of urine. A few sets a day can make a big difference in your bedroom stamina, leading to longer, more enjoyable sessions.
Feast your way to fun
Believe it or not, but certain foods can boost your stamina and enhance your sex life. Foods rich in antioxidants, like berries, nuts, and dark chocolate, can improve blood flow and energy levels. Spicy foods like chilli peppers contain capsaicin, which can increase your heart rate and trigger the release of endorphins, boosting your mood and arousal, and increase the time of intercourse. Omega-3 fatty acids found in fish like salmon can enhance cardiovascular health, improving circulation and endurance. Don’t forget about the zinc in oysters, which supports testosterone production and libido. Even simple additions like bananas, which are high in potassium, can improve muscle function and stamina. Incorporating these foods into your diet can help you last longer and feel more energised, turning up the heat in the bedroom and improve sex time. But of course, it's important to consider your dietary needs and consult with your doctor before gorging onto those spicy chilies in hopes of extending your playtime.
Talk it out
Communication is the unsung hero of great sex. Talking openly with your partner about what you like, what you want to try, and how you're feeling can make a world of difference. It's not just about giving and receiving feedback—it's about building trust and understanding each other's needs. When you're both on the same page, it's easier to relax, enjoy the moment, and experiment with new things that can prolong the experience. Don't be shy to discuss pacing, preferences, and fantasies. Good communication can turn a decent encounter into an unforgettable one, ensuring you both get the most out of your time together.
Beyond these, there are also some techniques you can try to get the best results.
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Edging
This involves bringing yourself or your partner close to orgasm, then stopping or slowing down to delay climax. Repeat this process a few times before finally letting go. It’s a surefire way to make things last longer and intensify the final moment.
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Switch Positions
Changing positions can help control stimulation and give you a breather. Plus, it keeps things interesting and fun. Try different angles and depths to see what works best for both of you.
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Mindfulness and Breathing
Stay present and focus on your breathing. Deep, steady breaths can help manage arousal levels and keep you in control. Plus, it’s a great way to stay connected with your partner.
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Mutual Masturbation
Sometimes, taking a break from penetration can help. Mutual masturbation allows you both to enjoy the moment, learn about each other’s preferences, and prolong the experience.
Using Personal Massagers and Vibrators
Let’s talk sex toys! Personal massagers are like your bedroom's secret weapon. They're not just for solo play; they can be a fantastic addition to your intimate moments with your partner. Using a vibrator during sex can add new sensations and help both of you stay in the moment longer. The vibrations can enhance pleasure, making it easier to pace yourselves and prolong the experience. Plus, experimenting with different types of massagers can add an element of fun and novelty to your routine, keeping things exciting and less predictable. So how do you use toys to boost sex time?
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Explore Together
Introduce a vibrator during foreplay or intercourse. It can add new sensations and intensify the experience for both partners.
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Focus on All the Right Spots
Personal massagers can be used on erogenous zones that might not get as much attention. Think nipples, inner thighs, or the perineum. The more you explore, the more fun you’ll have!
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Boost Confidence
Using sex toys can help take some of the pressure off and allow you to focus on enjoyment rather than performance. It's a great way to discover new ways to pleasure each other.
Having said that, don’t forget to check out some of our bestsellers, including the gift boxes with something for both of you to enjoy that process of mutual masturbation.
Time to bust some myths and get real about sex time.
Myth 1: Longer always means better—nope! Quality over quantity, folks. Sometimes a quickie can be just as satisfying as a marathon session. It’s all about connection and enjoyment.
Myth 2: Only one partner benefits from longer sex—totally false! Extended playtime can be awesome for both partners, offering more chances for connection, pleasure, and intimacy.
Myth 3: You need to last for hours—wrong again! What really matters is that both partners feel satisfied and connected. There’s no magic number for how long sex should last. Fact: Practice makes perfect. The more you communicate and practice techniques together, the better your experiences will be. Don’t be afraid to experiment and have fun!
Boosting your sex time and making those intimate moments last longer is all about exploration, communication, and having fun together. Whether you’re trying new techniques, using sex toys, or just focusing on being present with your partner, there are plenty of ways to enhance your intimacy. Ready to try these methods? Go for it! Remember, every couple is different, and what works for one might not work for another. Keep an open mind, be patient with each other, and don’t hesitate to seek help if needed. Your sexual wellness journey is unique, and it’s all about finding what brings you and your partner the most joy and satisfaction.
Also check out our blogs on - vaginal sex and unprotected sex
FAQs on how to improve sex time
How can I naturally improve time of intercourse?
Extend your foreplay, try out pelvic floor exercises, and keep those communication lines open with your partner. Practice makes it perfect!
What foods help to increase the time of intercourse?
Antioxidant rich foods like berries, nuts, dark chocolate, and spicy foods like chilli peppers may help. They boost blood flow and energy levels for longer-lasting fun.
Are there exercises to enhance sex time?
Absolutely! Pelvic floor exercises, or Kegels, can strengthen your muscles for better control and endurance in the bedroom.
Can stress affect my sex time?
Yes, stress can be a real mood killer. It can mess with your stamina and overall enjoyment, so finding ways to relax is key.
How do personal massagers help in extending sex timing?
Personal massagers add new sensations and keep things exciting, helping you and your partner stay in the moment longer.
When should I seek professional help to improve my sex time?
If you've tried different techniques and still struggle, it might be time to chat with a healthcare professional for personalised advice.
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About the Author
Disha (she/her) believes she's half therapist because people spill their guts to her with ease. But for now, she's writing sassy pieces on the internet about all things fun and pop culture. With a flair for wit and a curious spirit, she is all about digging into the saucy details of human intimacy.
